Cheryl’s Early Years

 Cherylanne’s Early Years

My sister, Cherylanne, always seemed much older than myself. That is probably because she acted as though she were my second mother, which only makes sense because Cheryl and Mom were so close. Those two spent countless hours in the kitchen together and it was clear that Cherylanne was Mom’s favorite. From my earliest days, I remember those two fussing over their Weight Watcher’s diet; measuring their fruit in a small scale and toasting cheese bread in the oven. As she became older, it was Cheryl who cooked most of the meals and she took over other parenting duties as well. She put up and decorated the family Christmas tree, for example, because the holidays weren’t my parent’s thing. When it came time to celebrate our birthdays, Cheryl was the one who asked us what we wanted for a gift to make our day special. Often, Cheryl went out and bought the gift herself, after my mother gave her the money, but would also buy us something that came from her and she used the proceeds from her job to buy it for us.

Cherylanne had many jobs outside of the home. She worked at Kentucky Fried Chicken when she was sixteen and she boxed up the leftovers to place in our refrigerator so that the kids always had our favorite food to eat. Other jobs included being a cashier at Target, a teller at a bank, and a hostess at Mama Grisanti’s, one of our regular restaurants that my father liked to take us to. An anecdote from her time at the restaurant was when she received a tip of just a few coins from a check of over a hundred dollars. Upset at being shortchanged, Cheryl ran out to the parking lot before the customer had a chance to leave, gave the tip back to him and said, “Here! You obviously need this more than I do!”

This demonstration of gravitas was unusual for my older sister as she was not an aggressive person. The Cherylanne whom I remember while growing up was shy and an introvert. The situation became so serious that my father got an exchange student from Ecuador for Cheryl to become friends with. The young woman’s name was Ruth Brenz and the two became inseparable. For some reason, Ruth came to love banana ice cream and she walked to Baskin Robbins with Cheryl at least once a week to get the frozen treat since it was unavailable in the grocery store. There were other exchange students but it was Ruth who really helped to get Cheryl out of her shell.

I think that Cherylanne would have liked to have a big house with an even bigger family. To pass the time while watching television in the family room, for example, she used to make architectural drawings of her dream house and she made drawings of her ideal wedding dress. Cheryl was so good at drawing that a pen and ink rendition that she did of a bridge in one of Louisville’s parks was selected to be printed in her official high school calendar. Also, in her spare time, Cheryl liked to sew and the patterns and clippings were strewn all over the dining room. In my opinion, she was born to be the perfect wife with a big family. She probably would have liked to have ten children instead of just the one.

One of Cheryl’s teachers in high school was Fr. Wagner. One day, after class, my sister went to the old priest for extra help and he became impatient with her. Fr. Wagner told my sister that she would never be anything more than a housewife. That slight stayed with her and gave her the fire that she needed to continue with her schooling. Cheryl took a course from a local school to learn how to take dictation. When that didn’t work out, she attended Eastern Kentucky University and earned a degree in law enforcement. After she married and started a family, Cheryl went back to school and earned her RN while living in Pennsylvania and made a thirty year career as a nurse.

Now that Cherylanne has passed, I am afraid that all of these memories would be forgotten if I didn’t spend a few minutes to type them out. As I watched my sister laying on her deathbed with literally hours left to live, I realized that our bond really came from our early years together. Now that she is in heaven with my parents, I regret that we had lost touch and wish that we could have become closer instead of distant. The image that will always haunt me is of Cheryl, lying in a dark hospital room with the machines whirring and pinging, and no one was allowed in to comfort her in her final hours on this earth because she was contagious. She was a giving person who dedicated her life to helping other people as a nurse and yet there was no one at her bedside to even hold her hand as she perished. It was a sad ending for someone who deserved much better.